Happy Day!

I promise this won't be a saccharine post about how perfect my 26-year-old  marriage--as of today!-- is. Because my marriage isn't always a Harlequin romance. Shocking, I know.  Yet despite the everyday pitfalls of any long-term relationship, the common threads woven through all of the romance genre and solid partnerships do remain: trust, commitment, willingness to change, passion. They just don't always show up together or even singularly, each day.

A Harlequin Moment in Moscow 

How can it be 26 years already? 26 years since my husband and I committed to be together forever.  That "forever" sounds daunting. It was, and still can be. Time, age and reality have proved to me that my marriage and my investment in it starts anew each day. I can't take it for granted, ever.  Sometimes a long-term relationship doesn't work out, shouldn't work out.  I get it.  I'm not the Pollyanna of relationships. The pain is too real for too many of my friends who have suffered through acrimonious break-ups and divorces. Spouses stray after decades of what looked like the "ideal" couple. Again, I get it.
I can only speak to my current relationship, today.
The changes in myself in the past few decades have been amazing, albeit excruciatingly slow. Instead of thinking "that's it, I'm outta here!" at each altercation/disagreement, I'm usually laughing before I can even finish spewing off whatever great retort I thought I had. If I'm not so quick to see how silly I'm being, my husband points it out for me with one of his classic dry humor lines and again, I'm laughing.
Is marriage hard? Of course. Because life is hard and marriage to this great guy is how I've chosen to enjoy my life. How I choose to live it each day.  It's brought me the gifts of sacrifice, compassion, and just plain doing what I don't want to do when it's needed. Patience, did I mention patience?
As I write each new romance novel that shows up in my brain and then nests in my heart, I am aware that it's my job to show that this couple has and will have their challenges, too. They'll have their happily ever afters, as well. The strongest common thread through my life, my stories, your stories, the books we love to read and write, is love. The long-lasting, unconditional kind.
As long as he leaves the toilet seat down.